Are You Trying So Hard to Prove Yourself That You Forget the Self You’re Trying to Prove? We live in a culture that loves to reward striving—be productive, be successful, be helpful, be strong. Many people carry this expectation so deeply that it becomes a way of life. Somewhere along the way, proving ourselves becomes more familiar than being ourselves. Poet Arielle Estoria names this pattern with one powerful question: “Are you trying so hard to prove yourself that you forget the Self you are trying to prove?” So many of us are. We prove we’re enough by saying yes when we want to say no. We prove we’re strong by holding everything together for everyone else. We prove we’re worthy by always doing more—at work, at home, even in our healing. But all this proving comes at a cost: we begin to lose touch with the quiet, steady presence of who we really are. When Over-functioning Becomes a Survival Strategy Over time, doing too much becomes second nature. You might not even realize you’re doing it. You just know that you’re tired. Or anxious. Or constantly second-guessing yourself. You may even feel invisible or resentful, while also being praised for how capable you are. That constant drive to manage, fix, help, succeed, or achieve? It’s often rooted in something deeper. Sometimes it’s shaped by childhood experiences where love felt conditional. Sometimes it’s a response to trauma, grief, or chaos. Sometimes it’s simply the weight of a world that told you you had to earn your value. Whatever its origin, it makes sense. It’s not a flaw—it’s a form of protection. But if you're reading this, there's probably a part of you that’s ready for a different way. You Are Not a Performance. You Are a Presence. There’s a you underneath the striving. A steady, wise, compassionate You that never needed to prove anything. You are already enough—just by being. That deeper Self may have been buried under years of over-responsibility, perfectionism, anxiety, or caretaking. But it’s still there. And reconnecting with it is one of the most powerful steps on the healing path. This is the heart of the work we do—supporting you in coming back to their your sense of worth, safety, and Self. Together, we gently unravel old beliefs and patterns that were formed to help you survive, but now keep you stuck. With time and care, you can learn how to live from a place that feels true, not just expected. Healing Isn’t About Becoming More. It’s About Coming Home. You don’t have to earn rest. You don’t have to prove your value. You don’t have to hold everything together to be loved. Real healing doesn’t come from doing more—it comes from remembering who you are beneath the doing. At Insight Counseling and Wellness, we create a safe and supportive space for this kind of remembering. Our approach is trauma-informed, holistic, and deeply rooted in reconnecting you with your own inner guidance—y our body’s wisdom, your emotional truth, and your innate capacity to heal. Ready to Stop Striving and Start Coming Home? If you're feeling burned out from doing it all, or like you’ve lost touch with who you really are beneath the roles and responsibilities, you’re not alone—and there’s nothing wrong with you. There’s simply a part of you that’s ready for something more real. Let’s start there. Learn more at Insight Counseling and Wellness or reach out to schedule a consultation . Your healing doesn’t have to be one more thing you push through. It can be a soft return to the Self you’ve always been. We’ve created a free self-reflection guide just for you: ✨ The Pause Before Proving – A one-page resource with journal prompts and a simple breath practice to reconnect before you say “yes” out of pressure. → Download the free guide here

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As the calendar flips to a new year, many of us feel the pressure to reinvent ourselves.

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The holiday season can be particularly challenging for those experiencing grief. While others are celebrating, you may be grappling with a profound sense of loss and emptiness. It's important to remember that grief is a normal response to loss. Whether your loss was recent, a year ago, or ten years ago, the holidays have a way of activating our grief. During this time, you might find yourself struggling with conflicting emotions. On one hand, there's pressure to participate in festivities and appear joyful. On the other, you're dealing with the pain of missing a loved one or processing a significant loss. This internal conflict can lead to increased stress, anxiety, and feelings of isolation. It's crucial to acknowledge that there's no "right" way to grieve, especially during the holidays. Some may find comfort in maintaining traditions, while others might need to create new ones. The key is to be gentle with yourself and allow space for your grief. At Insight Counseling and Wellness Center, we understand the complexities of navigating grief during this season. That's why we're offering a special "Grief and Loss During the Holidays" group series. This supportive environment will provide you with tools to cope with your loss, connect with others who understand your experience, and find meaning during this challenging time. Our series will cover various topics, including: Understanding grief and its impact during the holidays Coping strategies for difficult emotions Creating new traditions or adapting old ones Finding ways to honor and remember your loved ones Planning for the new year while acknowledging your loss You'll gain valuable insights, share experiences with others who understand, and develop strategies to navigate this season with more ease and self-compassion. You don't face the holidays alone in your grief. Register now for our " Grief and Loss During the Holidays " group series and take a step towards healing and finding moments of peace during this challenging time. Your journey matters, and we're here to support you every step of the way.